a gift & a privilege

have you ever read a verse over and over for many years, but then one day it takes on a whole new meaning and you read it in a totally different light? yeah, that's this verse for me.

Pregnancy is constantly on my mind. I will literally wake up in the middle of the night out of a deep sleep and my first reaction is to touch my growing belly and thank God for this miracle growing inside me. It is so amazing to me and I am so thankful that God has given me this chance to be a mother, something I've dreamed of for many years.

But pregnancy is a funny thing these days; sometimes I almost feel like it's a bad word. Tim and I joke around about this, saying how pregnancy is a disease that you have to treat with lots of medications and doctors. We are, of course, totally kidding, but that mindset is sort of true in society today. It's like we've forgotten that our bodies were made and designed for this purpose. This is completely normal and something (in my mind) that should be celebrated.

This tumble of thoughts was brought on after seeing a little blurb last night on one of the pregnancy sites I use to check on how our baby is developing and growing each week. The article was talking about buying new underwear for pregnancy. Yes, underwear. It was suggesting certain fabrics, cuts, and sizes and then ended with this phrase, "It's a good idea to buy a few pairs in bright, fun colors to cheer you up," implying that I will be disgusted at the size of panties I'm having to buy due to a growing belly. Seriously?! I know every woman's story and pregnancy is different, but in general why would we need brightly colored underwear to make us feel better? I'm already cheery and so happy to find that my options of pants that fit me is dwindling by the week. A growing and changing body is something that sort of comes with the package of pregnancy. It's what I signed up for, and it's a gift and a privilege that I do not take lightly, especially since I know there are many women who would give anything to have to buy new pregnancy underwear and will never have the opportunity.

Thank you, Lord, for this child you have knit together in my womb. There are many unknowns and questions ahead of me, but I know that you have equipped me for such a time as this. And in that I find peace.